Thoughts from the ED (from home)

I just finished this post and went back to proofread and realized it reads like a latter from war, which is depressing, but also they don’t get to go bra-less in war, so we’re WAY better off (besides all the obvious reasons). I thought about not posting it, but it’s my blog and these are my experiences and writing them down has been therapeutic…

Still here, still healthy, still alive (and thankful for all). Still working 7 days a week, with no real set hours (true story: this week someone asked me my work hours and all I could say was…. all of them?) except maybe when I’m asleep which ranges from 10pm to 2am. Great fun. I’m in a weird in-between area where I’m working from home, but also very much on the frontlines of this thing from a logistical and strategic point of view. I’m constantly on the phone with my physicians who are there, I’m coordinating clinical initiatives… It’s a strange place to be.

Breaking up my walls of text with random photos. Iggy, from my BO, on Monday.

My barn followed suit after my self-quarantine last week and shut down to everyone except essential staff. I did go out on Sunday morning (uh, I think it was Sunday?) and grab some tack that needed cleaning. To clean with all my abundant spare time I guess? Yeah, I don’t know either, but having a saddle sitting on my kitchen chair and a bridle on the table makes me HAPPY OKAY.

As much as this all just royally sucks, professionally it’s been a huge opportunity for me (and yes, I have a lot of guilt around that I’m dealing with). My skills are put to use every single day, I haven’t been this challenged in years and I love it – it’s the kind of work and thinking I thrive on. I keep the guilt at bay knowing it’s not as though I caused this and my output is directly affecting patient care and our physicians positively. (Doing some cool things around resource utilization planning, staffing quarantines and clinical predictive models to identify patients at high-risk of complications early.) The whole team is working equally as hard and we’re all planning our vacations come the end of this… mine is going to include a super long massage, just saying.

A local Girl Scout delivered cookies to my porch. AN ANGEL FROM HEAVEN, that kid.

My days are bookended with my scavenging my kitchen for something easy, edible and containing some nutritional value, showering and collapsing into bed. The weather has finally started to perk up some, so the windows are open and the fresh air has been a welcome addition to my day.

Finn the JRT likes to see what’s happening at work

Not much pony-related to relay – Iggy is living his grand old life, playing with his buddies in turnout (got a video of that yesterday), begging my BO for cookies and generally thinking he’s retired. That’s going to come as a rude awakening…

I ordered an Invictus half pad over a month ago and while Invictus was AMAZING to work with, DHL somehow… misplaced it for a month and then suddenly this showed up.

Spring season is all but canceled. Hopefully we’ll still get to have event camp in June and show this fall, but I’m not holding my breath or making plans for much right now. There’s a very real possibility we see a resurgence/second wave (feels wrong to talk about while we’re still in the first, right?) this fall and even if the public measures taken aren’t as extreme, work will be right back here all over again.

Not much more to report – Finn the JRT now thinks he eats dinner at 3:30pm because his sense of time is completely miswired, I have no idea what day of the week it is at any given moment, and I rotate through three pairs of the My fun for the weekend was mowing my lawn and my new hobby is letting the dog in and out 968234 times a day.

He did enjoy surveying his newly-mowed kingdom

Stay healthy, stay sane, wash your hands and hug your horse if you still can. More from the frontlines later…

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  1. What a lovely little backyard you have!

    I’m glad you’re surviving and doing well amidst the chaos. I have a lot of guilt around how well I’m doing, too, despite the travesties surrounding me. But it’s important to take what wins we do have and focus on them! And you’re so right, it isn’t like you caused this so why feel guilt? Ugh, such a slippery road that.

    Wishing you well <3

  2. yikes on your work load. I am glad you have the opportunity to prove yourself but mayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyybe take a litte more time for yourself, mmmkay?

    Also i too have a saddle at home from the barn but have I cleaned it yet nope but it makes me happy. I didnt bring the bridle home in case someone rides him. I got offered a lesson this week i just dont know. I dont want to push it. UGH….

    and yes what is up with the dogs wanting dinner early and wanting out fifty million times a day. OH and how does UPS or FEDEX know how to show up when I am on a conference call (And the hounds from hell start yapping) I am very quick with the mute button now ; HA

    stay safe!

  3. I’m really glad you’re able to work from home. And I feel for all of your coworkers out there fighting this. Thank you all for doing what you do!
    I’ve started to lose track of the days as well. Thank goodness my phone tells me what day it is!
    Stay safe and healthy friend!

  4. Thank you for all your hard work during this crazy time! I’ve been home almost 4 weeks now, and while it is a bitter pill to swallow about what horses and travel and FOOTBALL look like in 2020, I’m very glad to be healthy and safe with my family.

    Your JRT coworker is pretty adorable. Stay well!

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